by Beth Ann
Fennelly
Review by Luan Gaines
Fennelly knows well
the language of motherhood, an accomplished poet who has captured
those moments in childhood that both confuse and enrapture new
mothers. In a series of letters written for a former student who has
passed through the grief of losing a mother to marriage and the
expectation of her own baby, the author shares her insights into
that momentous journey, the joys, the fears, the doubts and the
expectations. There are no real parameters in this shadow world of
intuition, instinct and the things our mothers have taught us (some
useful, some not).
The changes are profound: the stress on a marriage caused by the
appearance of an infant, the sleepless nights, the depression over
excess weight and the difficulty of arranging alone time with a
neglected spouse, the role of caretaker isolating the mother from
her former life, all issues that new parents must patiently work
through together: "Truly, babies are hyphenated- they are
endearing-exasperating; they are amusing-annoying." But each phase
is bittersweet, lasting only a moment, including the transition from
baby gurgles to language skills: "Daddy can't eat wif us if we eat
girl cheese sandwiches."
Fennelly's letters to her former student are filled with personal
revelations, the evolution of her own personality through the daily
business of mothering a daughter: "Looking back, I see how both
poetry and love prepared me for raising Claire." What was meant to
be an intimate, private correspondence, in turn was passed from one
mother-to-be to another, frequently enough that this book was
compiled to share with all mother-to-be. Part memoir, part life
instruction, Fennelly blends language, experience and affection to
speak her truths: "I love science's instinct for metaphors, though
they all fail... your baby is like nothing that's ever been
created."
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Additional books by poet, Beth Ann Fennelly
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